Shower the People You Love (or at least like) With Praise

How many times have you worked yourself silly to give a great presentation, finish a project or go out of your way to help someone else out . . . only to wonder if anyone noticed? 

My guess is that it happens more often than you care to remember and it can leave you feeling less than satisfied, perhaps even incredibly frustrated. Yeah, me too.  

Here’s the thing, if it’s happening to you and me, it stands to reason that it’s also happening to those around you. Perhaps even to your own employees, friends, spouses, children . . .you get the picture.  Is it even possible that you or I might possibly be responsible for causing someone else to feel this way??  As much as I hate to admit it, I’m afraid so.  

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve found myself inside a corporate office or University, working one to one with senior management or staff members . . . it doesn’t really matter what title . . .the conversation very often turns to the topic of personal and professional value. Time and again the core issue is that they are in some sort of conflict (internal or otherwise) because they feel like they are not being recognized for their skills, talent, efforts, time - you name it.  At times, the frustration has been so intense that the person is literally ready to either give up their career with the company or simply stop making an effort.  In reality, they really don’t want to choose either option.  Would you believe that when I ask the question “What is it that you need in order to resolve this situation?”  ninety percent of the time the answer is “I just want to be told that I did a good job”  or “To be told that I made a difference.” Along those same lines, research shows that the majority of all conflicts in marriage and friendship can be traced back to one or both parties feeling under appreciated or under valued. 

Hmm, do you see a pattern?  Yeah, me too.  Yet, as frustrating and painful as it can be to be the recipient of the situation . . .how often to you find yourself really validating the people in your life. . .honestly? 

Now, before you start feeling the need to defend yourself it’s important that you understand that it’s not your fault.  I’m fairly certain that neither you nor I would intentionally cause someone else to believe that they are insignificant.  Odds are, most of the time we’re more worried about what other people think about us.  

In fact, I’ve seen some people become so concerned with making sure that they are recognized for their efforts that they would NEVER call attention to someone else’s great work for fear of being upstaged (yes, I know you would never resort to this tactic). 

In the interest of successfully retaining your friendships, employees, and customers, as well as increasing employee productivity,  it’s time to end the cycle.  Yes, I’m suggesting that you go out of your way to acknowledge the little and not so little things that others do to make your life and your career a success. 

Now, when you start to do this several things will likely happen: 1. You’ll feel a little ridiculous because this might not come naturally.  Not to worry, the more you do it, the easier it is.  I promise. 2. You’ll have a hard time finding things to “appreciate.”  That’s OK, don’t work at it too hard.  Just notice those times when you’re thinking to yourself “Wow, they did a great job,” etc. and then make an effort to verbalize your genuine thanks. The key is to offer sincere validation.  Remember, it is likely what the other person is looking for. 3. You won’t see an immediate payoff.  Be patient because eventually you’ll set a new tone in your environment and you’ll start seeing indicators that your efforts are being recognized.  Employees will become increasingly satisfied, friends may offer their help a little more often, and people will likely appreciate you more.  Activate potential and you’ll realize results. Ultimately, isn’t that what we’re all looking for?

Copyright © 2009 InBliss Coaching and Consulting LLC  All Rights Reserved Internationally.   Permission to reprint with attribution.

Contact Lisa and discover how you can accomplish your personal and professional development goals.

Lisa Broesch, President, Actualize Consulting Group

Partner in Professional Development • Keynote Speaker • Employee Workshops

1033 Featherstone Circle, Orlando, Fl  34761

T: (407)595-6771 • F: (407)291-9078

E-mail:info@inblissconsulting.com  • Web Address: http//www.InBlissConsulting.com

©2009 Actualize Consulting Group, All rights reserved. Permission granted to excerpt or reprint with attribution.

You're Only As Good As Your Word

Someone recently asked me what they should do to develop a “peer level”  relationship with their clients because they felt they weren’t getting the respect they deserved.  That same person forgot to show up for a business call we had scheduled for the following week. 

Hmm, is it a coincidence that they’re not getting the respect that they desire?  Not likely.  There’s a saying in business that basically states that you can usually tell how successful a person is by whether or not they keep their agreements.  In business and in your personal life, keeping your agreements is one of the top ways to show respect for another person.  And let’s be honest, who wants to have a “peer level” relationship with someone they believe doesn’t respect them?  

 Obviously, you would never even think of being anything less than a true professional...but just in case you know someone who might need a gentle reminder, here’s a few tips for keeping agreements that you are welcome to share.

Tip 1.  Show Up. Whether it’s a meeting with a partner, client, employee or friend, it’s essential that you are consistent in being where you said you would be, when you said you’d be there.  If you’re going to be late or not make it at all, call well in advance...better yet, do everything in your power to be there on time.  Five minutes late is enough time for your employee, partner or client to doubt  your commitment to the relationship and ultimately doubt your credibility and your professionalism. This is not the kind of thinking that will help solidify business (or personal) relationships.  

Tip 2.  Make the call.  I bet you can think back to at least one time you were expecting a call that was important to you (waiting to hear from a potential client, a job offer, the results of a test, a potential love interest) only to be kept waiting...and waiting...long after the promised day and time passed.  It’s frustrating at the very least.  Yet, far too often so called “professionals”  will avoid calling when they are uncomfortable with the subject or simply overcommitted.  Just take a deep breath, start dialing, and keep your agreement. 

Tip 3.  Deliver on your promise.  Whether you promised to finish a report, give an employee their performance appraisal, or bring the sports equipment to the game, someone is counting on you.  True professionals and those truly successful in life realize that they are only as good as their word. You seldom get an opportunity to reclaim the trust that can be broken by failing to follow through on a commitment.  If you gave your word, keep it...you never know who might be counting on you. 

When I first started my career, someone gave me a memo pad that said at the top “if they really want the project completed, they’ll ask twice”.  At the time I though it was kind of funny.  Now I realize that if I really want to be successful, once is all it should take.  

Copyright © 2008 InBliss Coaching and Consulting LLC  All Rights Reserved Internationally.   No portion may be reprinted or used without prior written permission.

One More Out the Door??

Think back to the last time you were really looking forward to something.  Maybe it was a vacation at an amazing resort, a great dinner out, or buying a new piece of state of the art electronics.  Oh, the anticipation leading up to the event!...Your life will be so much better!...Did the reality live up to your expectations?  Far too often the answer is a flat out “no”. Usually because the hype was far greater than the actual product. 

A few years ago I decided to finally indulge in my dream to spend a week being pampered at a luxury spa.  I researched all sorts of options all over the country, booked my airfare and ground transportation, and could hardly wait to go! The spa in Utah advertised world-class service, gourmet food, spectacular views and a top-notch spa.  From the moment I arrived at the resort I felt my excitement turn into deep disappointment.  The reception lobby had stark white walls, rental quality furniture and employees that looked less than thrilled to be there.  The spa featured fluorescent lighting, blaring rock music, and really nothing resembling “top-notch”.  Without access to a computer or a vehicle, I quickly phoned a friend who gladly helped me research other nearby spas where I might escape.

In my consulting practice, delivering on your brand is one of the top areas I stress to business owners and employees, because there’s always another company around the corner who will gladly take your dissatisfied customers.  For that reason, I’ve put together a few tips to help you assess your business and see where there may be opportunities to enhance your image.

Tip 1. Clearly reflect your brand.  Once you have defined how you want your company to be perceived, use your brand as a filter for everything your customer encounters.  In other words, if you are a spa and you’re advertising luxury and pampering, that should be the overriding theme at your establishment.   Your furnishings should be lush and your staff should actually “pamper” your clients. You could certainly add additional elements such as hiking and exercise classes but they should not be the focus.  Simply put, give your customers what they came for. 

Tip 2.  Think of your business as an “experience”.  In my many years with Anheuser-Busch Theme Parks, I often encouraged my creative teams to look at every detail our guests encountered.  From parking the car in the morning to leaving late in the evening there were hundreds of “experiences” that could make or break a great day.  Take a look  around your business and “see it” through your customer’s eyes.  If you were the customer, would you appreciate the overall experience?  Are you delivering on your brand or is it time to add some new and improved elements to your offerings?

Tip 3. Your employees are a reflection of your brand.  Whether we’re talking about a doctor’s office, restaurant, or call center, your customers expect great service from everyone in your company.  If your receptionist or other employees are rude or unknowledgeable your customers will view your overall business in that light and sales will likely suffer.  

Tip 4. Develop opportunities for emotional connections. Put some time into understanding how your customers might hope to “feel” as a result of doing business with you.  In other words, do you want them to feel energized, comfortable, relieved, rested, in “good hands”?  You can influence your customer’s  ability to “connect” to your business through the use of appropriate background music, lighting, paint colors, artwork, and your employee’s interactions with your customers. Think about how much a soundtrack can enhance a movie (whether it’s romantic or action packed). If you walked into a nightclub that didn’t feature great music and attractive lighting, would you want to stay and order drink? It’s very often the “feeling” we experience that prompts us to either move on or stay and indulge. 

 

Most of the tips I’ve mentioned can be addressed with modest impact on your budget and high return on your investment through increased customer retention...now that’s working InBliss!

Copyright © 2008 InBliss Coaching and Consulting LLC  All Rights Reserved Internationally.   No portion may be reprinted or used without prior written permission.

That's What I'm Talking About!

Since we're on the subject of business image, I just have to tell you about a new spa in Orlando that is second to none in terms of great guest service.  The owner is Sarah Woodgett-Athey and she was previously the Supervising Skincare Therapist at the Ritz-Carlton Orlando and the Canyon Ranch Spa Orlando. 

I must say, from the moment you walk in to the modest spa, you will feel like a dear friend who's visit is long overdue.  Sarah and her associate Milena know exactly how to make a busy person slow down and be pampered (they even have an express 30 minute facial that you'd swear was longer!).  It is definitely a luxury that I can no longer do without! 

Because the day spa is not attached or affiliated with a resort (you won't find a pool, hot tub, or steam room), their rates are very reasonable (massages are about half of what you'd expect to pay at a larger spa).  They have a peaceful relaxation room and a full line of skin care products available.  By far their biggest draw is their great guest service and incredible treatments - now that's what I call Bliss! 

Visit FaceHaven's website at www.FaceHaven.com or call 407-240-1212

Business Image... What's that???

Sure, we've been talking about the importance of building your personal image, but have you stopped to consider the image of your company or the company you work for?  At some point, we've probably all worked somewhere that we weren't proud of.  I know when I was 18 (yes, just a few short years ago) I worked for a company that provided security guards for construction sites.  Let's just call it Mr. X Security.   Though I generally liked the people I worked for, I really dreaded going to work.  The office that I worked in smelled musty, the drywall was crumbling, the carpet was in terrible shape, the windows were permanently foggy, and the place was literally falling apart.  

Over time, the owner of Mr. X Security began to add other odd jobs to his scope of work.  He started offering cleaning services (though I am positive that no cleaning had ever taken place in that office) and, at some point he tried offering child care services. It's not surprising that the quality of client and the quality of employee the company was attracting was let's just say... sketchy.

Hmm.... what went wrong here? 

Let's start with Branding.  When people see your business, they want to understand what it is that you do - what services you offer.  In a company named Mr. X Security, it certainly seems out of place that they would offer cleaning services and child care which have really no connecting points that I can think of.  It's not that you can't offer separate services or products...it just needs to make sense.  

For example, say you want to open a theme park and you want to call it Music World.  Great!  So you start to add in music themed rides, musical entertainment, a resort featuring great musical eras, a restaurant featuring famous musicians, etc.  Good start.  Now, you decide it would be cool to add in Dinosaur Land as part of the park because you think dinosaurs are really cool and because you found a bunch of them at a great price and they will take up a lot of space in your theme park. You'd also like to add in a high speed race track and a kid's oversized play area.  Hmm... really?  

It's so important that your customers (and you) are able to connect the dots. Once you added in the dinosaurs and race cars, the brand got cloudy. If you can tie them back to music then you might have something.  If the kid's area featured oversized musical instruments, maybe a tuba that they could crawl through, etc. you're on the right track.  Now, you might be thinking, I've seen theme parks that feature all kinds of stuff - race cars, talking mice, flying carpets, you name it.  The difference is that their brand is defined as "magical" or "make believe" or "an escape from reality" - now you can throw in the kitchen sink! 

The other piece is the first impression and overall experience that people get from your company.  If you have a cleaning company and your office is filthy... no deal.  If you advertise as being the "friendly alternative" to dentistry and your receptionist is rude... no deal.  If you have a spa that is advertised as "pure bliss" and your customers have to walk through a convention area, a noisy check in lobby, and crowded elevators... no deal.  You MUST deliver on your promise.  Think about what your customers might expect and over deliver.  I promise, if you have a cleaning company your customers will expect your office, vehicles, and employees to look clean and well groomed. 

Another example, if you have a company named InBliss, you will want to be sure to offer services that help to make your customer's personal and professional lives more successful, more rewarding, and more blissful in general.  Hopefully I've delivered on the brand.  

For more information, email me at info@inbliss.com or visit my website at WWW.InBlissConsulting.com. 

Copyright © 2008 InBliss Coaching and Consulting LLC  All Rights Reserved Internationally.   No portion may be reprinted or used without prior written permission. 

PERCEPTION TRANSLATES INTO REVENUE!

(Scroll down to the bottom for pictures!) I recently had the opportunity to meet Clinton Kelly of TLC's What Not To Wear show, which was very exciting (I also got to meet Stacy London last fall)!  It was great hearing him confirm all of the things I have long suspected were true!  For example: The average person has to try on 20 pairs of jeans before finding a flattering cut, color, and fit!  Also, you will likely need to have at least 50% of your clothing altered to ensure a correct fit!  How many times have you left the fitting room frustrated and irritated because 'it didn't fit right'?? What's funny to me is that I used to be Director of Costuming and worked with amazing seamstresses for years but I still felt that having my own personal clothing altered was something that should only happen occasionally - this has changed my perspective and given me a lot more room for what I felt was my own imperfections!

Speaking of imperfections... one of the things I often find when I am working with clients is that many people mistake making a positive impression and being perceived in a positive light for having to be perfect.  Don't let this happen to you!  Perception is a combination of things... being aware of your appearance, your behavior, your body language, your facial expression, your pitch and tone of voice, and the way you connect emotionally with others.  It doesn't mean you need to be perfect, but it does mean that you need to make an effort.  Research shows that often in the business world (more often than not), the way others perceive you contributes to your ability to get hired, attract clients, receive a larger salary, and be promoted.  In other words, perception translates into revenue.  Reach your full potential!  

For example, I also just finished working with an Image Client (see her before and after pictures) and when I showed her before and after pictures to a group of participants in a leadership workshop I was conducting, the response was overwhelming.  Hands down they believed that the person in the "before" picture was someone who was not necessarily happy, successful or in a professional occupation.  On the other hand, when they saw the "after" picture of the same picture they now saw her as a successful, friendly, happy, intelligent, trustworthy, professional woman.  What a difference perception can make! 

A few  things you should consider when you begin to work on polishing your appearance/building up your perception.  

*Perception is important for both men and women

*You can put on a pretty dress but it won't necessarily make you feel pretty- your image starts from the inside out.  You are good enough, smart enough, and doggone it, people like you! (if that doesn't work, you might want to consider a few self-empowerment coaching sessions which I offer through my coaching practice)

*Don't forget to "claim your space" - your posture and stature should not be overlooked - stand up straight, slow your pace and take longer strides when you walk. 

*If you decide to hire an image consultant, be sure they consult with you on how you want to be perceived.  Do you want to be seen as a high powered executive or an artistic free spirit... maybe something in between? You definitely want to be sure you have a defined target.  

*Your image consultant should be your advocate and work on your behalf to find clothing that looks great on you (not just clothing that the sales clerk wants to sell you).  They should also work with a professional hairstylist and makeup artist and oversee their work to ensure that you are happy with your new look. They should spend time with you to ensure you know which outfits you can mix and match to get the most out of your investment.  They should take "before" and "after" pictures to document your progress.  They should also accompany you or instruct your seamstress on where your clothes need to be altered to ensure proper fit.

*Your image consultant should be experienced and approachable, they should concentrate on building your self-esteem and reaching your goal.  They should also mirror the tips that they recommend to you. 

*If you are interested in hiring an image consultant that fits these qualifications, please feel free to contact me at info@inblissconsulting.com or call 407-595-6771 and we'll talk about options that are right for you. 

Copyright © 2008 InBliss Coaching and Consulting LLC  All Rights Reserved Internationally.   No portion may be reprinted or used without prior written permission.

Feeling "lucky enough" might not be enough

If you’re anything like me, you’ve been told all your life to stop your wishful thinking and just be grateful for what you have.  

Now don’t get me wrong, I’m in full support of having gratitude for every blessing in your life - in fact I think it’s  fundamental to living a balanced and blissful life.  However, what happens if or when you find that your current reality  just isn’t enough?  The answer is simple...aim higher.

Whether you feel that you want more satisfaction from your career or more meaningful personal relationships, the first step is understanding that it’s OK to admit that you deserve more.  In fact, in order to get more out of your life, it’s imperative that you claim the right to connect to your purpose, passion and true potential™.  

Now, keeping that in mind, it’s time to roll up your sleeves and get started on deciding what you want and putting the plans in place to start moving in that direction. As an executive and personal coach, I use the Dream Coach® process, a powerful and proven program that was founded by Marcia Wieder.  Marcia has appeared several times on the Oprah and Today shows and has taken this program all over the World.  I am fortunate enough to have been personally trained, certified, and mentored by Marcia...and am happy to share a few tips I’ve picked up along the way that may help you in creating the future you dream of.

Tip 1:  Say it out loud.  Yes, really.  Many times we have a dream or vision but for some reason or another we keep the vision a secret (not even admitting it to ourselves) because we feel we might be asking too much.  We have our secret dream, and then we negotiate down (often way down) to what we feel is more reasonable... and there we settle in.  It’s important to understand that you have every right to strive for more - to create the future you envision. 

Tip 2: Double check.  Once you know what “it” is, you’ll want to test just to make sure it’s something you’re really passionate about.  For example, if you decide you want to become a famous actor but really don’t care for extra attention... you may want to rethink your vision.  You’d hate to climb the mountain only to discover...wrong mountain. 

Tip 3:  Make some room.  As the saying goes, “out with the old and in with the new”.  Typically you’ll need to start saying no to unnecessary  things that take up your time and energy.  This includes saying no to negative thoughts and pesky doubts that might stop you in your tracks.  It also includes saying no to taking on extra projects and tasks that you aren’t really obligated to do (be honest, you know there’s a few out there). When you clear out some of the unnecessary clutter, you make room for bringing more of what you love into your current reality.  

Tip 4: Strike up a plan. Passion without a plan is just wasted energy.  In the past, I believed that “someday” all my dreams would eventually come true. The truth is, that belief is more likely a fantasy. Make no mistake, whatever your dream...you’ll need to put together a strategic plan and invest a little extra elbow grease to ensure your success.  

Tip 5: Find your “Dream Team”.  Let’s face it, some things are much easier said than done. No matter how strong you are, you’ll need at least one person to listen to your ideas, help develop your strategy, negotiate your obstacles, and cheer you on to success. Spend less time with those who don’t understand how important your vision is and more time with those who truly want you to to be happy (yes, they’re out there).  For a good start, I recommend you join the Amazing Dreamers online community at http://www.dreamcoach.com/cmd.php?Clk=2242140 

It’s free and it’s a great way to connect with other like-minded people. Of course, you can also contact me for personal coaching, using the Dream Coach® structured 12-week program designed to help you define your dreams, overcome obstacles, and develop a strategy to ensure that “someday” really is on its way.  Get started utilizing these tips and you’ll have more than just luck on your side! 

Copyright © 2008 InBliss Coaching and Consulting LLC  All Rights Reserved Internationally.   No portion may be reprinted or used without prior written permission.